Discoveries

Jan 29, 2017

Along the path of our life, when we pause to reflect, we may realise that our priorities, goals, meaning in relationships, ambitions and fears change as we grow older and wiser.

10 years ago, this time, I was beaming with pride. I was excited to be a new bride in the next 10 days. My current goals, relationships, pride, fears all have no semblence to the 25 year old me.

Recently, I read a poem on kindness. It expressed something like this: "To know and show real kindness, you must have been really, really sad and heart broken". I had my share of sadness and heart break in the last 10 years. It changed the course of my life. I mellowed down as a person. Pride and ambitions slowly lost their sense on my standing.

I'm learning to be comfortable in my own skin. Slowing down and not being busy is acceptable as my current life style. Reflecting and creating conscious experiences is now a way of life.

With that being said, I'm ready for my second act in this society, as a student and teacher of yoga and  Vedanta philosophies.

I'm grateful for the blessings in my life and the way it has unfolded. Without the burden of regrets and guilt, I feel ready to take on this journey as it unfolds.

I'm writing this blog to express my learnings along this path and for my children to read these one day and reflect on them. I want my children to know that when they are still pure and innocent, their mom was engrossed in pursing these studies for her benefit and their benefit :) .

ॐ शांति: शांति: शांति:

Paths of Yoga

February 10 2017

In yesterday's class, we talked about different paths of yoga - particularly karma yoga, gynana yoga, bhakthi yoga and mantra yoga.

My teacher said that all paths of yoga will be practiced by an aspiring abhyasi, and one style will be more prevalent than others.

While I was growing up in Chennai, bhakthi and prapatti (saranagathi) were the central theme in and among our family and friends. Visiting temples and offering prayers were the most common excursion and road trips we did together. Family reunions happened around homams, Vedic rituals and birth celebrations of Acharyas and Bhagavat avatars.

To me today, bhakthi is following the path of saranagathi as shown by our fore fathers. Lord Krishna summarizes this in Bhagavad Gita as

सर्व धर्मान परित्यज्य मामेकं शरणं व्रज
अहंत्व सर्व पापेप्यो मोक्ष ईच्यामि मा शु च:

Bhakti is the easiest, simplest, unassuming, compassionate form of yoga. This should not be confused with religion and religious practices.

Religion and religious practices are not as individualistic as the person that adheres to it.

The higher truth can be and when it is pursued upon, has to be realized by every individual for himself and there are as many means in this world as many people. Anyone and everyone can realize the highest potential irrespective of age, gender, geographical location on this planet, intellectual , mental and physical abilities.

Vedanta believes that we carry our sukshma shareera ( subtle body) through various cycles of birth and the knowledge, karma  gained/ performed in the previous birth will determine the course of the soul's progression in the next birth. To me that explains why someone ( any life form) is born thus (form, place, circumstances etc). With Bhagavad anugrha and Acharya anugraha , one can be guided closer to their own truth, but cannot be done by following a religious mass/ group.

What unfolds naturally after prapatti is selfless service through our actions. While we have accepted that fruits of our actions are surrendered to a higher power, what is left in us is carrying out our actions without any motives. Whether we perform acts for meeting our needs of well being, or for our family , friends, neighbor, community, nation and strangers from around the world, how easier and happier will it be, when we surrender the fruits of our actions. Easier said than done!

Gynana Yoga - The most difficult path to tread on is the gynana path. This path appeals to the intellect - buddhi - the vastness of Vedas and all the scriptures out there to explain the knowledge in Vedas to the learned is in abundance. Be it through different philosophical schools or through the numerous branches of sciences which are individually complete by themselves. The gynana path is difficult because, without a sense of total surrender, gaining knowledge will feed our senses (ahankara) and illusions about one being a learned person takes over the actual learnings.

Raja Yoga of Sage Patanjali - This is the how to manual for achieving progression in each of the above paths of yoga. The eight limbs which start with bahiranga sadhana ( external practice) and slowly progress towards antaranga sadhana ( internal practice) take us towards the levels of clarity
and clears the various lenses through which we "see" and "understand" "us" and the "world" around
"us".

Mantra Yoga - My teacher said that mantra is taking a divine potential in a capsule and taking it over again and again .What a simple and profound thought! Just like the Raja Yoga of Patanjali ( 8 limbs), mantra japa is a tool towards gaining a citta free of vrittis.

Reflections - Are you ready?

March 11, 2017


Reflections on the article: The making of a Yoga Acharya  - Process and milestones
http://yogavahinichennai.blogspot.com/2016/05/the-making-of-yoga-acharya-process-and.html



To know what makes you a good yoga teacher, we don’t have to look beyond the first word of the first sutra of the first chapter of the Yoga Sutra of Patanjali: Atha.

Are you ready to take up this study?

I'm ready to move inward.  

I'm ready to explore the territories of mind-body complexity

I'm ready to take responsibility for my thoughts and actions.

I'm letting go off blaming and complaining about how the world is treating me

I'm letting go off self-reproach and guilt

I'm willing to transform negative energies into productive action

I'm ready to be HERE and NOW , take responsibility to create a better future.

ACTION: Commit to Personal Practice

Milestone: Integration of body-breath-mind make energy levels better, aches and pains diminish, self-awareness improves, reactivity reduces, experience more peace and joy

Learning classical postures and techniques helps to understand meanings from which the function of a posture is derived and how to intelligently adapt or modify a posture or pranayama technique to address a very specific and unique need of the student and achieve a desired function

Meditation as a process of refining and concentrating the mind, methods and techniques and beyond these methods and techniques, touching and experiencing glimpses of insight – from that part of the mind which is beyond thought

Study the basis of Sankhya philosophy that underpins yoga and Ayurveda and discover that the mind and body share a unified field of existence, cannot be addressed in isolation, and how every aspect of the universe is connected and striving to progress in a state of dynamic equilibrium. The question of personal and universal dharma and the quest for an integral balance arises.

ACTION: Keep revisiting the below questions as you progress in your studies

Am I now more connected with my body, can I understand and respect my body more?

Is my conscious breath long, deep and subtle? Can I allow my breath to guide me into the present moment, and help me understand my current reality?

Do I have the necessary skills to teach, observe, adapt practices to the changing needs of the student?

Am I willing to learn from the students, accept and work on my apparent limitations?

Can my mind be open to learning and unlearning? Can I hold my thoughts, my “borrowed” knowledge and beliefs lightly?

Has my threshold for reactivity gone up? Am I now aware of my judgments?

Can I go beyond my self and touch another person’s pain? Can I feel true love and compassion?

Am I ready to continue to learn and evolve my skills and my practice knowing that this is just the beginning?

To explore beyond the 200 hr training:

• Include study of classical and relevant yoga texts that is contextualized for the contemporary yoga practitioner and teacher.
• Explore advanced and highly individualized teaching methods and practices and their application in daily living.
• Opportunity for community service by engaging with groups such as homes for underprivileged children and senior citizens, schools etc., thus taking yoga into the larger community.

श्रीमते अनन्ताय नागराजाय नमो नमः

Vasudaiva Kutumbakam

March 23, 2017


The title of this post appears in Maha Upanishad.
It loosely translates to "Vasudha eva kutumbakam" = "The entire earth (and its inhabitants) are one family".  Please keep thinking about that!

Discovering my dream(s) :

When I first left India to work as a software developer at London in 2005, I did not have any experience with the western life style. I remember attending a training session at Infosys, Chennai, my then work place, on cross-cultural sensitivity. Among other things, I learnt how to use a knife and fork, how the usage of English varies between India - Great Britain and America, casual and formal salutations for people at work place and mainstream society etc.
I was overwhelmed and intimidated to set foot in a foreign land and live all by myself for the next few months.

Since then, I have lived in the "western" side of this "divided" world for a little over a decade now. I started a family in this part of the world. This is not a cliched dream come true for me. I never dreamt of making it "big" in the world. In fact, when I finished my under graduation, I did not have dreams. I had very clear short term goals. I was very successful in achieving all of them.

I started dreaming in 2009.

My dreams coincided ( or may be not? ) with the most trying period of my life so far.
Major illness to a parent, loss of my first pregnancy to a rare medical condition shattered my world of successful short term accomplishments. The world was wide open and I had a fresh set of eyes , not literally, outlook of course :) (That's the best as far as my sense of humour goes ).

The first thing I did was to shed the identity that I held on to so far - I quit my engineering job, stopped interacting with my friends, and went into a quiet period of search.

My search started revealing what my dreams would be like. I called it "research" initially, now I would like to call it "svadhyaya" - "moving closer to s(S)elf by studying".

While undergoing this journey 2 things happened to me.

First, I started listening to the calling in me to explore teaching. At that point, I assumed a calling to  be a teacher to school children and make them wiser in doing Math, Science and Computers ( given my skill set). So, as a first step I started interacting with school children. I volunteered as a mentor for a middle school in the neighbourhood. Then, I applied to do my teaching certification for K-12 at UT, Austin. I told myself that I wanted to work with middle school aged kids because I had just started mentoring a 13 year old and was fascinated that I could hold on conversations with her week after week :).

It was not going well. It was like I had opened the cliched Pandora's box. My relationship issues and confidence issues came to the fore front and the calling and my efforts did not seem to connect. So, I quit the UT program, stopped mentoring.

Then I gave birth to my son(and later my daughter in 2015). What a blessing and joy they are in my life! I'm so grateful for the opportunity to be their mother and a mother's heart undergoes changes that cannot be anatomically described ever! Once you have the heart of a mother, you are a mother forever ( even when there is no child! ).

The period of unrest - East or West:

While I was concentrating and directing all my efforts on being a full time mother, I encountered a chance conversation with my mother-in-law on Vishnu Purana. That intrigued me and I started spending my down time on "researching" "ancient Indian scriptures". There was a parallel world that exploded and expanded right before me , like "The Big Bang Theory" or “Bramhanda Visphotak” (Yes, you are getting a hang on my humor sense ).


Discovering, reading and then studying one topic after the other on ancient scriptures and their vast commentaries revealed an "alternate" world of living and lifestyle to me. It had no bearing to the present day world and yet it was by no means out dated. It was so relevant in today's world and yet sadly not showing itself. Starting with giving birth and being born and until you forego the breathing body behind and beyond, there exists a completely different way of living and doing. The unused brain cells started opening up towards all the "alternate" ways. In Vedic thoughts, there is a complete world of knowledge which is independent and parallel to modern education - Language, Math, Physics, Chemistry, Biology, Art, Medicine, Surgery, Geography, History, Astronomy, Education, Warfare, Politics and every other branch of study!

With that knowledge, comes confusion. Now there is more than one way of living, thinking, even breathing! My mind took the wrong direction of determining which was the best! What a nasty route that is! But, going down that route was essential for me to be where I am today!

East or West, Home (Vasudha) is the best:

I said that route was nasty, because I was caught in the duality of "us" vs "them”. Slowing down in mind, creating purposeful experiences and taking accountability for my thoughts, words and actions led me to a place where I could relate to those around me from a heart space rather than the head space.

The transformation into exploring "other" perspectives, debating to find the best, realizing "Vasudeva Kutumbakam" is nothing short of amazing, humbling and gratifying.

I'm learning so much about ancient India (Bharath) , its richness in traditions and values, its contributions to the mankind and the planet, the atrocities of "us vs them" attitude and much more which words fail to express.

I'm opening up to reach out to myself, my dear ones and the community at large through study,
practice and teaching yoga. Is that what the call to teaching was about?

Modern education

March 27, 2017.

Namaste

ॐ असमद गुरुभयो नमः

I have contemplated about this for sometime .

This goes to the fundamentals of how we are educated. Based on my self directed research, I understand that education in ancient India, before the colonization, was offered to young boys and girls at age 7 after conducting a upanayanam ceremony. There enters a spiritual guru into their lives who educate them on all branches of study including math, physics, chemistry, geography, astronomy etc and specific study like warfare, architecture, veda adhyayana etc based on their family occupation. The spiritual guru runs a residential school known as gurukulam and practices like yoga abhyasa, sun salutations (Sandhya Vandhana), svadhyaya ( study of scriptures) and various other subjects happen over the next decade of the student's life known as brahmacharya. The student accepts his teacher as his everything and complies by the rules of the ashrams ( school) and at the end of his studies pays guru dakshina ( tuition) as demanded by the guru. The guru demands dakshina on an individual basis that depends on the student's capabilities and his teacher's vision for the student's future.

It is also said that even though Sri T. Krishnamacharya could have excelled in many capacities as a professor or religious head or scholar, he started a family and became a yoga acharya as that was the guru dakshina demanded by his teacher.

All this was replaced by the colonial type of education. The spiritual teacher was replaced and later absent from the general education a child received.

The education we receive today in schools and colleges do not involve spiritual education and above all religions and religious practices have taken the place of spiritual studies 😟.

Children who grow up with modern education start to get conditioned to be skeptic about the spiritual or meta physical aspects of existence/universe. In a way modern science has become a religion 🙂.

The Golden Standard

I borrowed the title of this post from a conversation with my brother. The conversation was loosely around how we all have set a standard for ourself and for people that are in our life and that come into our lives based on our conditioning in the past.

The Yoga studies today also revolve around such standards. The ancient teachings that were primarily passed down through guru parampara tradition has been sadly diluted due to these "standards".

While it is true that any art form has to be simplified in order to reach everyone, care and thoughts must be exercised in order to not dilute the teachings. Learning and teaching Yoga is an experience that progresses from outward practice to inward practice.

The same can be said about the notions of education, success and the values we try to pass on or develop in our children. In today’s world, children are under immense pressure from the moment they are born! While parenting doesn’t come with a manual, so do our children. When I get to see my children grow up from day 1 (which is a privilege that I’m very grateful for), I’m overwhelmed with emotions when I notice how honest, pure, forgiving and selfless they are! It is my wish that my husband and I keep it that way for them as long as possible before we apply our judgments and clouded outlook to “mold” them. I’m starting to believe more and more that instead of teaching children, we can show them by living with purpose and intent, practice kindness, forgiveness on us and others while they watch with their ever wide opened eyes and mind.

My yoga studies are providing such wonderful tools to have a unified thought, words and actions which naturally brings out integrity, peace and genuineness we all strive for. Keeping away from the curse of the “golden standard” is a wish at the moment and a reality for the future!